It's working for Sara E
New York, New York
"Employers need to look at task completion and not time in a chair. I could do my work in 40 hours over any stretch of time. Very little of it necessitates being in an office. And then I could do more with my time for my kids (dr appts, school stuff) without taking entire days off."
I wanted to breastfeed and also give formula. We mix fed both kids. Younger kid was/is lactose intolerant, so my diet changed and his formula was specialized. I pumped at work for both kids for about 2-3 months after returning.
12 weeks of FLMA. I was miserable to leave my kids and they looked so small to be without me. I cried. I ran through train stations to see them. My second kid was colicky and I had PPD and it was a bit more fraught. But I still hated leaving him.
Save all your money. If someone stays home, be realistic about if they can return to the workforce. Try to be creative with your time. Get all the help you can from family and sitters. Have a cadre of at least 5 sitters for emergencies. IT GETS EASIER.
Daycare where I live is prohibitively expensive. I made enough after taxes to pay for daycare for 2 and not much else. My job provides free health insurance for myself and my family, so the hidden paycheck is great. I had no idea the emotional toll of going back to work. Also, when pregnant and until my younger child was 6 months old, I worked 70-90 minutes away using public transit. The commute and lost time with them was difficult.
How hard it would be to walk away from my newborns when I returned to work. How much people now see you as a mom first, even at work. How little respect my husband’s work would give to being a parent.